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Tuesday, September 22, 2020

The house

the house



creek! went the floorboards as a boy called Johnathan who was home alone, rushed to the window breathing hevaly."huh-whats happening?" yelled Johnathan scared as if he was going to get badly hurt. crash! a ginormous thunderstorm awoke "help me!" screamed John with horror  in his eyes. he looked outside as rutes coming  up from the house. "whaaaaaaaaats happening!?" screamed John as he was getting sucked up into a tornado. 
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5 comments:

  1. AnonymousSeptember 22, 2020 at 1:22 PM

    Hi Kaylee!
    This is a really cool short story. I love the describing words you used. Just remember that when someone is doing a new action or has just started speaking, to start on a new line.
    From Mak :)

    ReplyDelete
  2. AnonymousSeptember 22, 2020 at 1:24 PM

    Hi Kaylee
    I like how you added a picture of what you were inspired by
    Next time you should reread and check some of your spelling (hevaly=heavily)
    But apart from that love your story :)

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. AnonymousSeptember 22, 2020 at 2:36 PM

      Hi Kirsten
      Thank you for spotting that mistake and letting me know.
      Ill make sure to change it.

      Delete
  3. AnonymousSeptember 22, 2020 at 1:47 PM

    Hi Kaylee that is a great story you have written I can't wait to see you in Tangaroa next year.

    ReplyDelete
  4. AnonymousSeptember 23, 2020 at 11:14 AM

    Kia Ora Kaylee, great story, ka pai!!

    ReplyDelete

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